Well it has taken ten months but I seem to be finally grasping (and let’s face it…accepting) my new role. Months ago a beautiful friend of mine recommend I read a book called “You are your child’s first teacher” by Rahima Baldwin Dancy. Like most things these days it took me a while to actually check it out from the local library, but I am glad I did.
During pregnancy I read a lot of books about my developing baby, morphing body and birth. Fast forward a year later, I am well and truly a mum and yet to pick up a parenting book. Okay okay lets be fair…parenting is a lot of learning as you go, especially when you hardly have time to shower let alone get comfy with a good read. But now we are all into a better rhythm of family life and I was surprised at how inspiring researching my new “job” could be.
I have learnt that in all facets of life you should gather knowledge from many sources and choose what feels right for you. Not everything in this book resonates with me but all and all there is a lot of food for thought and some total gems. The big one for me being the role of homemaker. It is tricky in this day and age to grasp what a homemaker is, I certainly had not thought about how I could embrace my new role. To be honest when I told people I didn’t plan to head back to work anytime soon I felt even a little hmmm… ashamed is too harsh a word but down the same alley. In my head the thought pattern went “fantastic I am a mum now! but what else can I/should I be as well? I still need to pursue a career right? because being a mum isn’t enough?? how daft is my head? or is it everyone heads?”
Rahima talks about creating a sanctuary for your family to live and grow within, a retreat from other stresses in life, a place where a certain rhythm guides us through the days, weeks and years. It has sparked in me a motivation to create an actual home that we can all find peace and love within. In turn I now feel like I have more purpose, this book gave my role more importance then I had previously allowed it.
Here are some other points from Rahima that I have been sinking my teeth and mind into.
- Creating rhythm in life each day, each week and each year by saying prayer before meals, reading a particular lullaby before bed, having Thursdays as baking day or park day or craft day! Celebrating birthdays, cultural events and the changing of seasons to embrace the special times of each year.
- Allowing children to become part of our lives without being the constant centre of attention by welcoming them to help with what needs to be done and allowing them time for independent play and exploration.
- The less is more concept (explored much more in Simplicity Parenting another parenting book, by Kim John Payne, which I am currently devouring at an even faster rate, but more about that one next time.).