Author: Mumsgoneclimbing

Our wedding was about more then “just us two”

~ Mumsgoneclimbing ~ Leave a comment

One year ago about this time I was rushing around with excitement and nerves jumping through my body, it was wedding week and we were full steam ahead. Ten years spent walking the same path deserved one hell of a celebration, in turn we had planned a DIY wedding weekend on a beautiful property with all our family and close friends.

w140830_441aRewind a decade and I have fallen head over heels for a guy who tells me he has no interest in marriage, something about ” a stupid meaningless tradition” (cue total disbelief and denial of the happily ever after girl). But like any good woman I disregard this difference of belief surrounding a major life event, and proceed forth falling in love and waiting patiently for him to change his perspective. Many a debate was to follow surrounding ritual, values, connection, family, tradition. Now you may think this seems a ridiculous situation, one sure to lead to manipulation and bargaining, and maybe you are right…but here is something else it lead to.

My partners reluctance to marry lead me to explore and question what marriage and a wedding really meant to me. I was forced to justify my desire with more then “that is just what we are suppose to do next”. Tradition of old was reinvented and we interwove aspects of ourselves into every part of our union. Each element reflected a part of what was important in our world. And number one wasn’t the dress or food or bonbonniere’s , it was bringing our family and friends together to celebrate. After all our journey was as much about them as it was about us.

The day after I married Steve we were driving to brunch, alone for a brief time, when I began to laugh with joy. I was reflecting on the day just past and I could hardly believe it had been OUR wedding. It was so special and joyful and tear-filled and heartfelt. There was an air of connection all around, like everyone there was in on a beautiful secret. Today I want to share with you some pretty darn special parts of our wedding, little things that in the end made it more magical then the happily ever after girl of yesteryear could even imagine.

w140830_048Tea is a huge part of our world. It seriously is a ritual that brings us together, like no matter how crazy life can be we know there is always time to share a cuppa. So what better ring vessel then a vintage tea tin, found by my mum and just so happened to be bearing the famous Shakespeare line “That which we call a rose. By any other name would smell as sweet”

w140830_073_fotorSteve never wanted a  traditional bridal party and I must thank him. I didn’t have bridesmaids, I had “Nell’s league of extraordinary women”. They could wear whatever they wished and they lead me down the isle then scattered throughout the crowd. Each had different roles including witnessing, speech, readings, MCing and holding my hand as the wedding car wove it’s way to the ceremony. I loved that throwing tradition out the window allowed me to honour each extraordinary woman.

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As part of our ceremony we shared a drink from a two handled cup. It is a Scottish tradition and the special cup is called a Quaich. We choose to dedicate the moment to my grandfather and Steve’s dad who have both passed in the last two years, off to the next adventure away from earthly soil. By the end of the day I believe most guests had drunk from the Quaich and there was a whole new ritual being developed.
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Our son Boston turned two just before we were married. He is such a huge part of why our union moved to a deeper level and it was so important to us that he was included in the ceremony. We wrote vows for him, and created a family charm with each of our birth stones and tokens with our Chinese animals.

VowsLast but not least, music is a big part of life, and we had a real desire to have everyone up and dancing. We also love eating delicious food every weekend at the farmers markets. Why two such random comments…well put them together and we find Andrea Soler. The most gorgeous ray of sunshine we could hope to include in our wedding. Her gypsy beats did exactly what we dreamt and dance we did!
w140830_507 w140830_576 w140830_736_2 w140830_752a_2 w140830_754_2So here I am on the eve of our first anniversary feeling oh so grateful to have my freakin awesome husband (HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!!), and even more grateful that our wedding included so many extraordinary human beings. Hope you enjoyed the flash back xo

*Photos are all thanks to the rock your socks awesomeness of Todd and Alyda from Todd Hunter McGaw Photography.

My week off social media

~ Mumsgoneclimbing ~ Leave a comment

For the past week I decided to unplug from social media and reduce my internet use. Why? mainly because I feel that this tool in my life is becoming a weird addiction. It is disconnecting me from the present moment and giving a sense of connection with others that doesn’t particularly run deep.

IMG_3742_fotorIt is Monday, day one, I sit waiting for coffee and automatically reach for my phone, then stop because I can’t. Instead I look around. I notice that the baristas all have beards, and smile at a group of trendy elders who laugh at each other’s wit. Well hello world, here you are.

It’s amazing the space in my mind that is taken up with thinking about plugging in. Take a photo to share, look up this fact, find that thing, quick who is doing what? Reaching for my phone or computer is like an itch, annoyingly wanting to be scratched and encroaching on my day.

As the week goes on it becomes much easier. When I think of something I will need to research online I write it down. If there is a friend I need to contact I text or call. I pull my lap top out of the draw for a little during the kids nap then again at night. But I am not sucked into an ever updating newsfeed of information I was not conscientiously seeking. Instead I check my email, go through my research list and then complete projects offline.

Sunday eve and I am considering checking back in but I feel really strange. It’s been a week without the constant sharing back and forth. I know when I open up the portal to life online it will not have missed me. Though I thought about it often and somewhat compulsively, I have no doubt my lack of presence went unnoticed, the constant stream wouldn’t look blank because I didn’t post. I know my need for plugging in is not a reciprocal one, and that makes me feel tuned off to it all. I have always had a thing about feeling special, but social media can make you feel like the over zealous lover of the biggest player on the block.

So what have I learnt? I definitely have an addiction to plugging in, and it is not one that is serving my best interests. I was able to achieve quite a bit when I left the distraction of social media and constant internet perusal. There were projects I had been meaning to get to for some time that actually got DONE. The other thing I realised was I was externalising my worth, throwing myself and a pretty version of my life out into the world for someone, anyone, to approve and validate. Without the constant intention to share my experiences I was able to enjoy them for exactly what they brought to MY life and to MY family.

I am not ready to give these tools away, lord knows most of the word runs through them, but I am more then happy to commit one week a month to unplugging.

Dad be stepping up

~ Mumsgoneclimbing ~ 1 Comment

I freakin LOVE my husband. Sure he annoys me to no end, leaves his clothes all over the house and has a distinct knack for relaxing on the couch while chaos reins around him…totally none the wiser. BUT…I love love LOVE him, and every single day I feel beyond blessed to have him on my team.

Although we’ve had our up’s and down’s the years roll on and with each one our connection is stronger. When parenthood landed on our door, with all the surprise of snow for an Aussie Christmas, I knew our relationship was hitting a big test. After all it has been my experience as a witness that children tend to make or break a relationship.

To my utter delight (and quiet confidence) parenthood proved to only deepen our understanding and compassion for each other. My man stepped up to the plate as a little human catapulted us into a life with a level of purpose and dedication that we had not experienced before. Suddenly what was important actually seemed a hell of a lot more important then… hmmm anything previously. And LOVE!!… my gosh, we learned to love more then ever before and this love was unconditional.

IMG_3490_fotorNow here we are welcoming another member to our family and getting pretty darn use to Little Roo being our number two. And my husband…well he be stepping up yet again. Sure I already knew he was a great dad. But with one child it is easier for mum (or whomever happens to be primary carer) to juggle the bulk of what needs to be done. I know this isn’t every family’s dynamic but it certainly seems a trend among my tribe. When you add another, not soooo easy. The team has had to reinvent itself, change the strategies and pull together. It’s not always beer and skittles, but certainly results in an ever deepening family connection.

So to my main man Mr G, thanks…for stepping up and being the insanely amazing man you are… I am truly grateful 🙂

p.s remember this when I am tired and grumpy and send you evil mumma eyes xo